The Christmas solution.

Sorry to bemoan this, people, but I came up with a solution to the stepfather gift thing that I can live with - and it will make my mother happy.

I'm going to buy movie theater gift certificates for my mother and stepfather, and I'm going to put them in an envelope for BOTH of them. That way, my mother can't say I didn't get him anything - and she'll get taken to the movies once in a while, which means that he'll be forced to think of her in his outings.

They do the same things every weekend, so this gift would give them an opportunity to change their plans.