Wednesday, June 02, 2004

How this all came about.

My friend Lucas, reading about yesterday's exchange with my father, wrote me back some actually useful advice when it came to the crush thing at my store. This, of course, led me to elaborate to him about how the whole thing.

******

This is our correspondence, with Lucas's comments appearing in italics:

well, i don't know if you're asking for advice or not...buttttttt ;-) here are my two cents.

first, innocent flirting is not harassment and it's a great gauge of someone's romantic interest. So, try flirting with him and see if you can discern whether he's remotely interested. if you're bad at flirting, there are several great books on the subject. I would steer clear of any comments that could be potentially alienating or offensive...you mentioned a propensity for this in past blog posts. I say kind eyes and a smile go a long way over a witty comment.

What do you like about him?

Signed,
flirtaholic

_

Um, well, I'm an obvious flirt, which is something I'm trying to curtail, and the kind eyes and smile I've been using have been effective enough. (At one point, I looked at him while I was waiting on a customer, and he turned and - I think - caught me doing it. He smiled and seemed to sorta blush. Maybe this was a trick of the light.)

My first days there, he was the only one who was nice to me and asked me how I was doing when I appeared overwhelmed or stressed. That probably started it.

Then, a couple weeks ago, he got this great haircut. Like, a haircut that made me have to look twice to see if that was really him. I wasn't working that day, for I was just there getting my paycheck.

I walked by him and said, "You look terrific." Because he did.

"I got a haircut," he said.

"I know," I replied.

At one point a couple days ago, I asked him how old he was, and he said that he didn't say. Then, he said he was 72.

And I looked at him and said, "Damn ..."

And he said, "Yeah, I've had work done."

Sometime later, I asked him what magazines the AARP sent to his house and if he subscribed or if they just started sending them, like they did with my mom.

And he laughed at that.

So I think I just need to stop talking to him altogether.
_

ohmigod, it sounds like you should do the opposite of stop talking to him...keep talking to him and being a flirtaholic!

so many people don't seem to know how to flirt. little did i know you were an expert!


******

That's where the correspondence, so far, has gotten.

And though it's encouraging and nice to hear someone like Lucas say all that, I think it might be best if I honestly just leave it all be.

Contrary to how I make myself sound, I have not traditionally been good or successful at this. Usually, I'm downright awful and obvious about it.

(I remember my creepy daily stare-offs in college with this guy I liked named Jeff. Eventually, he asked me to turn around and stop looking at him.)

It's a new job, and things are shaky enough.

I've just gotten an impression from this guy, which isn't enough to actually base any "next move" or whatever upon.

I shouldn't do anything.

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