Wednesday, September 08, 2004

The "What If" Episode.

At a certain point in any long-term TV series, there always appears to be some dream-sequence episode where the characters make an "It's a Wonderful Life" choice. Then they spend the entire episode seeing how different their lives would be if they'd made a single, defining choice.

If I had that option in my life, I don't honestly know where I'd choose to make changes. I mean, what if I'd not been born with cerebral palsy? What if my parents hadn't divorced? What if they'd never moved to Georgia? What if I'd been attracted to girls? What if, instead of journalism, I'd chosen to go into psychotherapy as a career? What if I'd written a film? Or a novel?

What if I'd tried to make things work with Welsh Guy?

Um, but my life is a "what if" episode. Everyone's is. This isn't fiction. There probably aren't, you know, alternate universes, places where I walk without a limp or live happily ever after with Welsh Guy in some London flat with Miss Gibson visiting regularly. Or, I don't know, some situation I can't even imagine.

My dreams have been sorta realistic lately, kinda colorful, but they haven't been good.

I don't really know what's in store for me. I hope it'll be good.

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