Trivia team update.

Ron asked me how my trip back to trivia at Joe's on Juniper went last night. I told him that the team came in third. And I told him that I went psycho and screamed profanities at a waiter.

Ron asked me for details.

I wrote this:

My friend Jonathan joined the trivia team a week ago, and, since I didn't attend that one, he called me up drunk that night and told me that I missed out on a good time. He told me that he and Michael - the salt-and-pepper-haired, sulking one who's partners with James - had played a prank on someone that night. They'd sent a waiter over to an ugly-ish girl on our team, and they'd had the waiter tell her that a badly dressed, creepy man was interested in buying her a drink.

Apparently, she got all flattered and confused until she found out the truth, and Michael and Jonathan found the whole thing really funny. Jonathan played a similar joke on me four years ago, and I didn't take too kindly to it then.

So, last night, I was there with my friend Nick, and we were talking to Debi, who asked Nick what he was looking for in a man. Jonathan and Michael were on another side of the table.

Since Debi was listening to his list of requests, I went ahead and gave my list of "what I'm looking for in a man."

At first, she told me that maybe I should look for a man when I'm sober, which was funny. But then she got serious.

"You think too much," Debi said to me after a while. "And I wouldn't set you up with someone I liked because, after dealing with you, they wouldn't like me anymore."

Debi, of course, always has method behind what she says - even if she says it bluntly - so she elaborated after she saw that her initial comment kinda stung. Her son Ian even mentioned that, maybe, what she'd said was sorta hurtful.

I sat calmly and listened to her tell me about why I'm really incompatible with most men, though she didn't exactly tell me anything new. I'm high-maintenance, paranoid, untrusting and a handful.

"Yeah, but that, unfortunately, doesn't keep me from looking for a guy - even if I should," I said.

"You shouldn't stop looking," she said, then she saw the look on my face and asked me if I was all right.

"I understand why I'm single," I said. "I've been pretty much single since I was 19, and I understand why."

"How old are you now?" she asked.

"28," I said. There was a silence.

I got up to walk around. I looked at the jukebox, which was unplugged.

I saw my friend Jonathan up, talking to our waiter. The waiter had a pad out, writing an order down. Jonathan then walked past me at the jukebox, not looking at me. I followed him back to the table and sat next to Debi again.

"You all right, honey?" she asked me.

"I'm fine," I said. "Is Jonathan playing a joke on that girl Lynn again? I saw him talking to the waiter."

"I don't know," Debi said.

"How'd she react to it last week?" I asked Debi.

"She was upset, but she didn't really rub Jonathan's face in it," Debi said. "I would've tried to get him back."

"He tried to trick me four years ago into thinking a guy liked me," I said. "And I went off on him."

This was the conversation the waiter walked into.

"There's a gentleman over by the bar over there," the waiter said to me. "And he sent me over because he wants to buy you a drink ..."