Late-night desertion.

Ash was "inspired" by sex and caffeine two nights ago to leave my
apartment at 3 a.m., while I was asleep, and head to his office to do
some work. He changed the voicemail there and came up with a handy
checklist that will help the office manage its caseload.

I woke up at 6:50 a.m. with a stomachache, trying to find my
boyfriend, but he was gone.

I called his cell, and I didn't get an answer. I called his office,
heard the changed voicemail message, assumed he was there and idiotically left a
message for him in the general mailbox. I figured he'd get it before his two co-workers did.

Something like, "It's early, early in the morning, and you were gone.
I don't know where you are. I just woke up, and the voicemail is
changed, sweetie. It sounds really good. I hope you're all right."

At 10 a.m., one of his co-workers got the message and gave it to him
while snickering.